Monday, August 24, 2009

I Went on a Trip, yeah.

I Went on a Trip, yes.

They say variety is the spice of life. That means that doing different things than normal is akin to adding a tasty spice to a bland dish. Like normally when I cook (go to Subway Sandwichers Shop) I ask for hot sauce on my chicken sandwich. But yesterday I asked for EXTRA hot sauce.

Taking a trip is supposed to be like adding extra hot sauce to the sandwich that is life, because you will see things on this trip that you won't normally see in Newmarket....like beautiful women!!!! Zing, take that Kyle.

I'm afraid to say that San Francisco failed me. They should call it Bland Blandcisco, because then it fits into my metaphor about spices nicely.


Hey look at me, I'm a bridge! I've never seen a bridge before! Oh wait, nice try bridge, we all know you're just a rip-off of the bridge at Fairy Lake in Newmarket that goes over that part of the lake that is narrow enough to traverse by bridge. Or that other bridge that overlooks the waterfall by Fairy Lake, or that wooden boardwalk at Fairy Lake that goes over water so is technically a bridge.

Not to mention the fact that there is nothing at the other side of that bridge, you just have to turn around and go back.....and I really had to go to the bathroom and you aren't allowed to pee off the side. Well at Fairy Lake you are! And the bridge leads to that playground with a spider web climby thing.



Oh my god a paved street? Take that Newmarket! Oh wait, Lombard Street? More like wanna-be Crossland Gate Boulevard. This street leads from the top of that hill to the bottom of that hill whereas Crossland Gate leads from Emma's old house, all the way to my old house, all the way to Big Graham's old house, past Phil's old house, right by Ryan's current house, passes by Reid's old house and then it just keeps on going. Does it ever end? I don't want to know.

Not to mention how impractical this curvy flower street is, pfft look how long it takes to drive down it. Crossland Gates curves are like a good wine, dependable, not too harsh, and a third attribute that would not seem to make for a good wine quality which makes it a hilarious joke, let's go with "paved with asphalt", hahahaha.

San Francisco wasn't a total bust though, I did get to do something Ryan never got to do in his life ever, something you can't do in Newmarket, or Toronto, or even Stingray Bay featuring Sharks at the Toronto Zoo. I touched a SHARK (pause for the photographic proof)

Read it and weep boy.